Did you know there are 2 taxmen in Japan?

There is the “Income tax” man – who takes a small chunk of your salary and gives it to the National government.  It is a pretty damn small amount for poor English teachers, 5%.

Then there is the “City tax” man, who usually doesn`t catch up with English teachers, cos we never stay in the country that long.  Most English schools don`t pay this tax out of your salary – this is your responsibility.  This is based on your last year`s salary, so English teachers don`t have to pay this for their first year anyway.  This is actually higher than income tax – 10% or so.

I have been over here for 2 and a bit years now, and the City tax man has got around to contacting me.  And he wants most of the money that I saved up over the last year.

My choices look like:

- pay it (I have the money)

- ask the city to let me do a payment plan (since I am poor English teacher)

- hope they don`t get around to taking me to court till after I have left the country (thinking to go home in 6 months or so), but if they do, pay it.

Had this hilarious conversation with my Girlfriend last night -

Me – I`ll ignore it

Her – (scrunches up face) that doesn`t sound good

Me – OK, I`ll pay it

Her – (scrunches up face) that doesn`t sound good EITHER.

Hilarious

PS.  Anything I have said in the past about Japan being a low tax country was wrong – it isn`t low, its only reasonable.

PSS. And I found out that the income tax scale slides, like in Australia.  Earn more, pay more.

The Olympic Funding Question

Living away from Oz, I can read newspapers etc but I don`t think I have a good feel for what is happening back home.

I don`t know how big an issue this is, but the recent discussions on Olympic funding and the Crawford report caught my attention.

I am not Anti-Olympic sports, but a couple of recent statements made in support of the Olympic movement caught my eye …

- Adulation of top sportsmen leads to greater local participation in these sports

- Australians want to be one of the top medal tally countries at the Olympics

Well, the first point … is it true?  I`d like to see some research from somewhere on the connection between elite sport and grassroots participation.  The second point … looks like something worth either huge polling on or a referendum; because I don`t care what our medal tally is.  I think it is worth finding out “what Australians want” on this issue.

As a football fan, seeing the dedication and excellence that people can reach in non-popular sports with the only reward (usually) being non-monetary … its worthy of respect.  Like that band that will never reach the top, but they love music so they keep on touring.

 

for the love of god do not assume that a car will stop for you at a zebra crossing in japan …

yeah yeah, japan.  runs like a swiss watch.  the anti-individual collective loving home of the most anally retentive people on earth.

guilty as charged.

but don`t expect anyone to follow the rules about zebra crossings.

see, there are rules about the rules.  yes, there is a law saying that walkers take priority at zebra crossings, but i think that most people think that drivers have priority over walkers, so the zebra crossing rule is not followed.  sometimes i have had the shits with it, and brazenly walked across a zebra crossing, giving the driver an angry “don`t even think about running me over” stare while they give me a “how dare you!  i should run you over for your insolence!” stare.

even did my really angry stare and held my arm out when this one car kept on coming.

you can pretty much expect any other rule to be followed, religiously.  just not this rule.  because it breaks unspoken community hierarchy chains.

taiji is about 30 km down the road …

that is the town featured in the new doco “the cove”.  the town that broome just cut its sister town ties with. probably some of the kids i teach are from families that hunt dolphins.

saw some shorts for the “cove” and i am not really sure if i want to watch it.  got the feeling that i would be bashed around the head a bit with the sight of screaming bloodied dolphins as they are hacked to pieces. without seeing a bunch of cows, chickens or pigs being killed, i would perhaps feel the movie was lacking a sense of comparison.  i would wonder if i was being emotionally manipulated.

dolphins are beautiful.  so are cows.  beauty has never been a reason to not eat something.

not sure i am for or against dolphin eating.  not sure it matters.  it would take a lot to get dolphin killers in japan to give up the practice.  more than just a couple of protests and a doco.

an awful listening mistake and questions that shouldn`t be asked …

when i first came to the land of the rising sun, i found it quite difficult to get my head around the sounds used in the japanese language.  mistakes were a plenty.  including listening mistakes.  hell, even stuff that may have come from english ends up completely different when it is adopted into japanese.

thank you became something like “sanku-ewe” …

imagine my surprise when i heard the japanese word for a g-string bikini … t-back.

of course – being STUPID i heard it as teabag.  and i could never bring myself to ask anyone why the japanese word for g-string bikini was teabag. it was … unanswerable.  i could not imagine how that name came about.   it was months before i had the chance to hear somebody say it again and realise my error …

baseball kids and soccer kids

went to footy practice last week.  there is a small indoor space with artificial grass that we use.  its next to the local baseball park.

i was walking past a group of baseball kids and they all said “good morning (sir!)”.  buzz cuts, uniforms the right size, clothes tucked in.  these polite, disciplined boys looked like they would love to join the marines.  jogging in unison.

pretty different to the soccer boys.  big hair, dyed hair, some buzz cuts.  shirts out.  oversized and normal sized gear. practicing stepovers and fancy lifts.  not in unison.  the word “rabble” comes to mind.

the kids who wanna join the marines with their baseball gloves.

the final fantasy rejects with their dazzlingly bright shoes and party tricks.

tis very interesting to see the different cultures these two sports seem to engender.  the different kids that get drawn towards them.

there are pro baseball players with fancy hair etc etc, but the buzz cut seems much more common.  its a necessity with the need to wear caps and helmets and the heat here on the coast south of osaka.

i wonder if we have these kind of group of demographics back home in oz.  do soccer kids look different / act different to bball kids?  or what about the leaguies and the rah rahs and the afl kids?

scotland is not a country

above is something i said over some drinks to a scottish friend.  whilst i am a contrary bastard, and well, like being contrary, this was more than just pushing a mate`s buttons (even though that is fun in and of itself).  where is the seat at the UN, or the olympics?  where is the scottish passport?  or army?   if you don`t have all of those cool things, then i figured you are not a country.

but then i checked out the dictionary to see what the hell a country is.  and the definitions i found did not agree with my position.

seems like i was talking about something called “an independant state”.  a country is a different kettle of fish apparently.  a country can be an independant state, or it can be part of an independant state.

what i would like to know is who are the other non-independant state countries?  do they exist, or is it just a british thing?

i know of stacks of independant states made up of very diverse pieces – belgium has a flemish speaking south and a walloon speaking north (or something like that), spain and catalonia, indonesia, phillipines, india – places with huge cultural, racial and lingual diversity … but i don`t know who else wants to be called a country despite not having a un ticket.

ps.  through having a foreigner as its head of state, australia does not qualify as an independent state.  i don`t mind.  how many countries have queens?  i reckon thats pretty cool.

power imbalances and morality …

played through Silent Hill 1, the old PSX game.  and had a blast.  apparently this game has “good” endings and “bad” endings.

on the first play through, we got the “bad” ending.  which i thought was quite fitting.  for such a dark game.

but we are now playing through again on easy in order to get the good finish.  which seems like a good enough idea.  its a short game.

but.  the tone of the game has completely changed.  my character is now packed to the gills with bullet boxes, and health kits.  the enemies are now fewer.  and i can`t help but feel sorry for the enemies that do come around.

cos i am a malevalent godman who will shoot them and then kick them to death for a few extra points.  what were demonic hellhounds baying for my blood the first time round are now stupid mutts that just happen to have no skin.

and i stomp them to death.

i`m the good guy?  no.  i am the aggressor.  i choose to engage in the violence.

say hi to the bad guy.

bye fuka

teaching english is a temporary lifestyle.  unless you own the school, or unless you are a mid-level manager in one of the bigger english schools, the expectation is that you will be moving on.

the cash isn`t bad, but it is lower than the average wage in japan.  and schools generally don`t pay towards your retirement pensi0n / superannuation.  understandable since the expectation is you`ll be gone in a year.

it is also amazing how many students you see pass through a school.  studying english isn`t cheap – 2000 yen per lesson seems about the standard.  kids pay less.  and it must be so easy to lose motivation, studying something you rarely get the chance to use in real life situations.  and for kids, english lessons are just one choice out of dozens of extra-curricular studies / hobbies that can be chosen.

anyways.  one of my best child students just left.  she can read as well as kids 3 years older than her.  easily remembers all the things we study in class.  only uses english vocabulary in class and will think through how to say something that she hasn`t been taught.  has a real desire to communicate.  and a sweet kid to boot.

nobody stays forever.  not teachers.  not students.  i guess the goal is to give a kid a positive experience of language studies.  and of foreigners.

bye fuka.

rats in a cage …

a long time ago, i saw an article …

someone did some research – one set of rats were put in a cage with a metal floor wired to an electrical circuit.  they were zapped at random intervals.

another set of rats were put in a similar cage, but there was a button in the corner.  push the button and the shock stops.  they were zapped at random intervals, but twice as often.

despite being zapped twice as often, the second group had lower stress markers than the first group.

the point being that a sense of control lowers stress in shitty situations.

my lovely friendly little english school is gonna switch from 3 teachers to 2.  student numbers are down.  apparently there is a bit of a global recession or something at the moment?  this could be the beginning of the end for my lovely 2 year, working-part-time-in-a-beach-town holiday …

but by thinking through what i will do if it all goes to shit, i can create a sense of control and keep the stress levels down.

what am i gonna do?

- find another beach town, or maybe a mountain town

- go teach in thailand or mongolia or something

- get back into the australian or queensland public service

- go fruit picking in oz for a bit

- something i haven`t thought of yet

- go live off my parents for a while

a couple of years ago when i was working in the queensland government, i had 2 job interviews in the first half of the year.  one was for a graduate position with citigroup (talk about dodging a bullet), and the other was with a kindergarten in japan.  i never know what kind of opportunity will come my way.  its an interesting ride, my career.

a while back i had this deep philosophical discussion with one of my students, i asked him who was happier, the pessimist or the optimist.  i think i am a happy pessimist.  try to think of the worst thing that could happen, think about what i would do, then rationalise (or is it realise???) that it isn`t so bad, move on with life.